Simon,
This may be of help. Had a service this weekend. I've never had the scale of problem you seem to have had, but I did suffer from rapid heating up in traffic jams. I initially bled the system, changed the fan switch, changed the sender and finally concluded that (as I hadn't lost any coolant) that the gauge was crap and have since ignored it. After the service, I was told that the water / antifreeze mix (bad) had been completely drained and instead replaced with a neat pre-prepared proprietary coolant (can't remember the name but will check). I then had to endure a traffic jam lasting a million years while driving across London in pretty hot weather. The temp gauge reached 80deg and remained steady throughout. No fan, no overheating - the only difference being the coolant.
I know it sounds basic, but this was something I had overlooked in the past.
Hope it's of some help,
James