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the properties of wibble


Boonie Hound

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As we all know wibble is often light hearted and quite looney - a bit like a Caterham 7. So if this is the case is it possible for us in the bikesheds to produce enough to distill into a material to make a Caterham. Obviously some sort of wibble mould will be needed for the raw material.

 

Come on bikesheddders I need your wibble to achieve my dream car and at least lighten up my day.

 

All wibble will be accepted and chortled over

 

(Must get out more.....)

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YOU ASKED FOR IT.............

 

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When a cat is dropped, it always lands on its feet, and when toast is dropped, it always lands buttered side down.

Therefore, if a slice of toast is strapped to a cat's back, buttered side up, and the animal is then dropped, the two opposing forces will cause it to hover, spinning inches above the ground. If enough toast-laden felines were used, they could form the basis of a high-speed monorail system.

 

I've been thinking about this cat/toast business for a while. In the buttered toast case, it's the butter that causes it to land buttered side down - it doesn't have to be toast, the theory works equally well with Jacob's crackers.

So to save money I think you just miss out the toast - and butter the cats. Also, should there be an imbalance between the effects of cat and butter, there are other substances that have a stronger affinity for carpet.

Consider that the probability of carpet impact is determined by the following simple formula:

P = S * t(t)/tc

Where P is the probability of carpet impact, and S is the "stain" value of the toast-covering substance - an indicator of the effectiveness of the topping in permanently staining the carpet.

Chicken Tikka Masala, for example, has a very high S value, while the S value of water is zero. tc and t(t) indicate the tone of the carpet and topping respectively, the value of P being strongly related to the relationship between the colour of the carpet and topping, as even chicken tikka masala won't cause a permanent and obvious stain if the carpet is the same colour.

So it is clear that the probability of carpet impact is maximised if you use chicken tikka masala and a white carpet, in fact this combination gives a P value of one, which is the same as the probability of a cat landing on its feet. Therefore a cat with chicken tikka masala plastered on its back will be certain to hover in mid air.

Contrastingly, there could be problems with buttered toast as the toast may fall off the cat, causing a terrible monorail crash resulting in nauseating images of members of the royal family visiting accident victims in hospital, and politicians saying it wouldn't have happened if their party was in power as there would have been more investment in cat-toast glue research.

Therefore it is in the interests not only of public safety but also public sanity if the buttered toast on cats idea is scrapped, to be replaced by a monorail powered by cats smeared with chicken tikka masala floating above a rail made from white wool shag pile carpet.

Sounds logical to me, have fun.

 

😬You laugh at me because I'm different, I laugh at you because you're all the same. 😬

 

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I have heard about people playing Heavy Metal backwards so I thought I would try it with a Country and Western record.

 

My wife came back, my truck started first time, they let my Daddy out of prison and my dog made a full recovery.

 

😬You laugh at me because I'm different, I laugh at you because you're all the same. 😬

 

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Brilliant - the power of wibble is among us - praise be.

 

I have now fashioned wheel out of the wibble so far for my virtual seven.

 

There was a slight wibble leek when the buttered cat managed to appear with Pat's camel. However I just shoed them the sign: "If you notice this notice you'll notice this notice is not worth noticing" at which point they were so confused I was able to contain them in the wibble field.

 

More wibble needed - I also have a big dilemma - do I go for wibble cycle wings or not?

 

PS You are all very scary - but funny 😬 *thumbup*

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but what happens if the cat attempts to turn and lick off the chicken tikka masala 🤔

If it turns with the direction of spin it will increase the rotaional speed, resulting potentialy in a catastrophic loss of equilibrium, and curry all down the walls *eek*

 

or

 

it turns into the spin, counteracting the effect, and causing it to drop onto the floor looking confused

 

hmm, time to catch one of the *@!# cats that keeps cr*ping on my lawn and try an experiment *tongue*

 

Caterham 21 VHPD *cool* - one of the few *thumbup*

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Does it work for other animals?

 

For example my dog always manages to land on my foot when its leaping about.

 

How does that fit into Kev's equation? I fear that if I cover my foot in curry that the dog will just eat it....and the curry.

 

Wibble ometer rising nicely by the by - still have not resolved the cycle wing debate and will need a great deal more for an engine...currently two wheels on my wagon. And a big grin on face at work 😬 *thumbup*

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"but what happens if the cat attempts to turn and lick off the chicken tikka masala"

 

That one's simple, the direction of spin only affects the distance the cat sick will reach.

 

With the spin it should easily reach the windows, against it will probably stagger under the bed to puke up after hitting the deck.

 

Dunno about your lawn, I'll ask Snot, but he's unlikely to confess 😬

 

 

 

Brrrrrrrrr..... *cool*

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Oh, thats rich.....

 

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😬You laugh at me because I'm different, I laugh at you because you're all the same. 😬

 

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